In the Beginning....

Our adoption application was accepted!

So we have our first appointment to begin the whole homestudy process, this Tuesday (March 3rd). There is so much wonder that goes through one's mind, when beginning this leg of the journey...."is my house clean enough" "will I answer that question correctly" "do I look like a good mom" it can be overwhelming. I understand that it is completely necessary to insure the safety and well-being of the child...but I really don't like being judged...but who does...So I'm excited, nervous....happy....and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to bring our kids home.

Turning 3

There is something that happens when you strap a gun...real or fake to a boy's (or man's) hip. I took pictures of my son today...dressed as a cowboy. We are having an "Outlaw Johnny Cash Cowboy" B-day party....he is turning three. He immediately took on a whole different personality...walking different, making mad faces and asking if he's allowed to shoot birds. I had a good laugh this afternoon...watching him strut around...I had to convince him to wash the moustache off to take a nap. I love throwing theme parties...I tend to go over the top...but this is the day that my heart was flooded with joy....the day that ended the longing for a child and the day I became a mama. I still remember seeing his beautiful red lips, skinny legs and almost bald head for the first time...and singing "you are my sunshine" as I rocked him to sleep in the nursery. This is going to be a fun party...I'll post more pics after next weekend.

I freehanded this card for my husband for Valentine's Day...it came along with some freshly baked brownies and a 4 pack of Jones Soda...we are celebrating tonight, Friday the 13th (dundundunnnn) because tomorrow I'm getting my CCL (Concealed Carry License)...why is Friday the 13th so "unlucky" who made that decision? Why not Tuesday the 13th or Monday? I always liked Friday the 13th because someone would always call in a "bomb threat" to our school...and we just got to screw around all day...well while all you love birds are going out to dinner, getting dozens of roses and watching sappy movies...I'll be shooting my heart out.

Dear Birth Parent

So the update is....YES! This is the ideal agency for us. We felt extremely comfortable and are super excited to be turning in our application later this week. They asked us to start working on a scrapbook and "dear birth parent" letter that they will present to each birth family that we match....I don't even know where to begin...my heart is flooded with emotions and run-on sentences, oh and 8 years worth of photos. I'm just trying to sort through it all.

Hobby Lobby is having an amazing sale on all their scrapbook supplies....which this time, I didn't hesitate to buy the album I've been coveting for the past year, with no real excuse to buy it...until now...it's beautiful....black and aqua damask...

So now I'm happily looking through all our photos on our computer...remembering when Jude was born....the stories....trips...experiences...and thinking that someday...hopefully soon....my son or daughter's birthmother will be holding this album...turning the pages...seeing just a glimpse into our lives....... and choosing us.

To be or not to be....we will see

A couple of weeks ago, my hubby, Jude and I were driving home from a fantastic lunch at a new bakery when we saw a huge sign that read "Adoption Services." We quickly looked at each other in surprise because there isn't an adoption agency for hundreds of miles in our state. Joe asked if we should turn around....in which I replied..."sure, but it's probably an adoption program for pets" (LOL) I quickly realized we were both dressed NOT to impress...which is important to me...I don't know why, but it is...we went in...and yes it IS a real adoption agency that is just getting started. (they've also worked with the foster care system for sometime) They were very nice....(but not in a bubbly kind of way...which I admit, makes me nervous...) and professional....and they didn't seem to mind that we were not dressed to impress LOL....we actually walked in on a meeting they were having...but they took a couple of minutes to gives us the info we desired. Needless to say we have an appointment with them today at 5 pm. I'm excited....but there is always that side of me that says....it may be too good to be true. However I did say that when Jude's birthmother said "yes, I would like you to adopt my baby"....so that's not always the truth. I'm trying to keep myself from daydreaming about a new nursery....lol...ahhhhhh the joys of waiting