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2011-03-02T08:55:00.000-07:00

my son's 5th birthday...surprise lunch with dada!

It's been a while...a long while.

It's been a busy whirlwind these last give or take 6 months. I've seen my daughter grow from an infant to a mobile tornado and my son begin to read. He starts Kinder in the Fall...no more homeschool for that kid. It was a hard decision...but mama being his teacher was not working for the both of us. He's brillant...and knows it...we are both stubborn, strong-willed...and quite frankly I'm tired of fighting him everyday. So off to private school boy! (I'm still homeschooling him...only we aren't doing it everyday) I can't believe it's been 5 years since his birth...we celebrated his actually birthday by having a surprise lunch with dada....and that weekend we had a lucha libre party. I'll blog more on that later.

Okay so...the last time I posted I wanted to lose weight, was going to see an encrinologist, had labs done etc. Well....I went to the encrinologist. He was a jerk. I sat through his "seminar" and saw him the next day. He asked me what my goal was. I said "well, I'd like to lose weight and....." He interrupted me and said "well, I'm no FAT doctor!...the correct answer would have been a baby" I was speechless. He said "you probably have PCOS soooo, it will take you a year...you can't eat any carbs...so go on the Atkins diet....and that "running around after kids all day" is obviously not enough exercise. "I told him how can I have PCOS and have always had a regular period and that the only symptom I've had is cysts?" He said "hmmmmmm" and ordered a bunch of tests and then his goon came in to tell me all about their financial plans. He was like a cars salesman and by the end of it, I wanted to punch both of them in their ugly faces. Sorry, but I did. Then the gyno came in and gave me all the orders and said he'd call me back with the results. I got the blood tests done at a place where my insurance pays 100%. About 2 weeks later I get a call from the gyno's nurse...who was extremely rude. She said that I had had the bill sent to the gyno personally and that I needed to pick it up immediately and pay for it. It was over $400. I told her all I did was go to the lab...I didn't "have them bill the doctor" She said...well you must have checked off a box or something...but you need to come get this right now!" Wow. So I went...picked it up and called the lab. I told them what happened. They were really nice and said that the gyno set it up that way...and they'd take care of it. I never got a call back from the gyno. So I don't have the results...I've called and left messages. I went to the lab yesterday...they said it will take 30 days for them to mail me my results. I just want to know if I have lupus or don't have lupus.

I decided to see a nutritionist. I got on a eating plan. 1200 calories, 30 grams of fat, no more than 10 grams of sugar per serving...limit red meat, eat breakfast, snack, lunch, snack and dinner, drink 10-12 glasses of water, exercise 5 days a week. PORTION CONTROL.....and I discovered Zumba.

Oh Zumba how I love you! I went to several different classes until I found my "match" I love my instructor and the people that go there....and I sweat like hog...and I'm sad when the hour is up. I'm expecting my Zumba pants today...they have ribbons on the butt...and I'm so going to wear them!

The only time I can't eat carbs is at dinner. I set a goal to lose at least 40 pounds by my birthday, which is in 2 weeks. I've lost 39. I've dropped 4 sizes in 4 months. I feel amazing. I still need to lose between 10-15 pounds after that.

I went to my regular doctor a couple of weeks ago...he had some labs that came to him from the nutritionist and also when I had that kidney stone...I have high uric acid...which can cause gout...if I had gone on the Atkins diet...it could have killed my kidneys. I probably won't be able to eat read meat again. I'm waiting for some more results to see how bad it really is...I've limited it to once a week...as part of the diet...so I'm hoping that will be enough. If not, I may have to become a vegetarian that can't eat oats, legumes, asparagus, yeast, spinach...basically all my favorites...so we will see. I still want to punch someone.

Sorry this is a bunch of medical issues...but I felt like I needed to say all of that...so I don't punch someone!

Okay onto other business. I can't wait for Spring. I'm so ready to start the veggie garden...and this year, so is my son. We saw the veggie and herb plants yesterday at Wal-Mart....he knew what some of them were! He wanted to get some right then and there. But we need to replace our soil...and this year I was to start a compost pile. I can't wait to get my hands into fresh earth and smell Spring rains...ahhhh.

Enjoying the Moments

2010-09-30T00:23:00.000-06:00

Japanese Tea Gardens, San Francisco

It's been weeks. A lot has happened...all good..well most of it. My hubby and I celebrated our 10 year anniversary this month by going to San Francisco....without the Littles. It was so amazing and needed. We enjoyed every moment we had together....walked a lot...talked a lot...drank tea...laughed...and remembered our honeymoon pizza and wine. We missed the Littles. I had the great idea of making packets for Jude to open every morning. Included was a letter with drawings, activities for the day (Playdoh, poppers, bubbles..etc.) Photos from when he was a baby, candy, confetti, small toys and homework. I forgot to mention that we started homeschool...I'll blog more about that later. We also took photos everyday and uploaded them so that my mom could show him what we did that day....I wanted to make sure that eventhough this was a "mommy and dada vacation"...he was still missed and included. It worked. He was actually upset that he didn't get one on the day we came home!

Before the trip I had kidney stone surgery, an ovarian cyst the size of a grapefruit (I still do), a hurt back and knee....and I'm vitamin D deficient. So slowly I'm addressing these one at a time. I saw an OBGYN for the first time in 6 years (I still get a yearly check-up with my family dr.) for the cyst and they haven't decided what they are going to do. However they do want to help me figure out what is wrong... maybe PCOS, Lupus, enter other stupid infertility issue here...so I've been passing out blood samples left and right....and we are just waiting for the results. He also had me see an infertility dr.....cringe....who's also on this treck to figure out what's going on....I just want to be able to exercise...but enough about that.

Brother and Sister

Little Van Gogh

We started homeschooling Jude. It was hard in the beginning. He's an action boy...and only 4 years old...but we are now a well oiled machine. He read and wrote his first word yesterday..."bat"...he was so proud. I've enjoyed exposing him to the things I love...like Art. In San Francisco we went to an art museum...where my passion for art was awoken again. We saw Monet's, Renoir's, Caillebotte's, Whistler's and more...my first thought was how could I share this with Jude. So every week we "study" about one artist...the first one was Vincent Van Gogh...we talked about him, his career (or lack of it), cutting off his ear, and the technique he used...I had an old Van Gogh calendar I found while cleaning under our bed (perfect timing) and he loved looking through all of them. We then mixed glue and acrylic paint to make them extra thick...I drew a scene with swirly skies, hills and trees...and had him paint a starry day picture...he did so well....he then used a fork to make "brush strokes" like Van Gogh's painting had. We had a moment....and I hope that we continue to. He also started soccer and music class. That is a blog all on it's own!

Whitesands, NM 5 months

found this fabulous dress in China Town!

Scarlytt is an amazing baby girl. She's 6 months already. She rolled over 2 weeks ago and sits up for a long time. She hates bananas and apples....but loves all the veggies...except peas. She's overly in love with watermelon. She has started to smack her lips when she's hungry. She is a mama's girl. I love dressing her up...but she spends most of her days in just a diaper. It's such a blessing to see Jude and Scarlytt interact with one another. They just love each other so much....Jude loves making up songs like "I love my sister...she's so pretty...I love my sister...she's so chunky...I love my sisssssssster....all while she laughs and coos and grabs his face. Hopefully we finalized next month!

So for now I'm enjoying the moments....

4 months

2010-08-13T00:09:00.003-06:00

This summer has been full of firsts....Jude's first time playing T-ball, attending a preschool activity class by himself, going camping, being a big brother and seeing the Alamo. I made jam for the first time and Scarlytt got her first taste of rice and oatmeal. We've been busy. I've had little time to myself and much less time to craft. We finally have settled into a routine and I'm slowly adding stuff to my store. I miss it.

Scarlytt is growing so much. She is full of life and we are starting to see more and more of her personaility. She is a happy baby...easy to please....and has started blowing rasberries...Jude calls it "giving you addertoots" (attitude) She hasn't quite made a complete roll over...but she's trying. She's a drooler, spitter upper and blow out diaper girl. I'm sure that TMI. She turns 5 months in 3 days. One more month until we can petition for adoption!

Jude starts homeschool and soccer next week.
I'm ready to smell Fall.

3 months

2010-06-21T23:36:00.000-06:00

You are such a delight. You have opened so many doors of creativity in me. I love making you "pillowcase" dresses, ruffle bootie covers and headbands for every outfit. For the past 3 weeks, you have slept through the night. No sleep training required. You are discovering your laugh and are very ticklish. I can't tickle you long enough to get you to giggle because I start laughing so hard. I enjoy watching you discover the world around you...you grab everything in front of you and scream in delight. I love watching brother be a brother to you...he asks everyday when you will be big enough to play. You weigh 13.4 pounds!

Just 3 months ago I was waiting for my miracle. I'm praying for all my friends that are waiting for theirs....

Belle of the Ball

2010-05-19T01:12:00.000-06:00

Dear 2 month old Scarlytt: You are an amazing baby. You are beginning to coo and smile...and every once in a while, yell in delight. You weigh 11 lbs 5 oz and are 22" long. You love the swing and hate the bouncer. You have a talented gift of getting out of the swaddler...no matter how snug you are. You got you ears pierced today...and cried for less than 20 seconds...and then fell asleep. You love to sleep and you can do it anywhere. Brother came up with the name "tootie" for you...because you are a cutie patootie...He loves you so much. When you cry, he'll run over to you and whisper..."it's ok, brother is here" I'm so grateful for you and thank God for such a precious gift.

love,

mama

Family of Four

2010-03-31T21:27:00.000-06:00

Wow...I never knew it could take 20 minutes to get into the car. I've learned in the last 2 weeks...that adding another kiddo to the mix...someone always has to go poop. We are home home....and we haven't stopped. We are also preparing to throw my son's 4th B-day party this weekend...yes...2 months late...but a full force dress up kinda party...hey I should be hanging castle walls right now...so I'll keep this short. We are in the end stage of the adoption process...baby Scarlytt has to live here for 6 months to become a "resident" of our state...and then we can file for finalization.

She is a sweet baby. Sleeps well...eats well...and is super laid back. She's only thrown a couple of 2 am parties. She is a delight..and we can't wait to see her personality unfold. Our son had a rough first week...trying to figure out his role...he is officially the diaper thrower and door opener. We are all adjusting well...

We are now a family of four.

Scarlytt Raquel

2010-03-19T15:02:00.000-06:00

Our beautiful girl is here...and she's perfect. I will tell you the last couple of days are a whirlwind behind us. We got a call last Monday that the doctors decided to induce the birthmother..we threw things in a bag and headed 14 hours to the hospital. We didn't make it to her birth...I got to hear it by cell phone lol...and heard her first cries. She was born on my birthday.

God is amazing. His gifts are perfect. His mercy and tenderness towards me is undeserved....He is so gracious.

I've enjoyed hearing the little squeaks of a newborn...even smelling like puke n' poop....she is so peaceful...and has mounds of hair!

LOL

2010-03-04T10:16:00.000-07:00

(enter whirlwind here)
We drove through the great state of Texas in record time...especially with a 4 year old. The birthmother had a amniocentesis done this past Tuesday....and we found out that she isn't as far along as we thought. They are guesstimating around 35 weeks or so. They don't know. I'm glad that baby girl still has some "cooking" to do. The reason they were going to induce was because for a 39 weeker she was measuring small...and they were concerned that she wasn't growing properly...so all along...she just isn't "done" I'm flying back by myself in 2 weeks...well that's the plan...but like we all know...plans change.

God's hand is very much in control...and I love it.

my "rescue guy"

2010-02-23T21:55:00.000-07:00

Today is my son's 4th B-day. This is a day that God ended my sorrow, pain and longing for a child. This is the day that I became a mama. I will remember this day until I die.

I will remember that it rained that night as we slept in the car. We just couldn't go to a hotel...we didn't want to miss his birth. He was perfect. I will remember feeding him that morning and singing.."you are my sunshine"...and watching his every move. I love being your mama Jude...with all my heart.

I didn't know then..what I was in store for. A bright, witty, passionate, hard-headed, teaser of a boy...one who loves dirt, trucks, playing pretend and reading books. One who would say "I'm a leader"...with such declaration...that I believe him. One who argues with everything and likes things in a particular way...and I guarantee it was the exact opposite of how you wanted it. One who doesn't like to lose. One who loves to pray...and calls himself a "mighty man of God" One who is passionate about music...especially Johnny Cash. One who loves soft things and hates the cold. One who loves to love.

I love you my Jude...and I'm so thankful God blessed us with you. You are my "rescue guy", my knight, and my precious gift from above!

2 week count down!

2010-02-19T12:16:00.001-07:00

Yesterday we met with our lawyer...and all the paperwork is pretty much in order...phew! (enter huge sigh of relief) The lovely birthfamily had an appointment yesterday and they told her she was full term and that if she didn't go into labor within 2 weeks...they would induce! (after checking to make sure baby girl's lungs were developed)

I'm still in a state of shock...all I can think about is finishing her room, cleaning and packing...and making sure we have everything in order. I think I'm just too crazy excited that I don't know what to do with myself.

I'm feeling so much better, now that I had my gall bladder removed! It's so nice not to be in pain anymore! I ended up having over 1 inch gall stones!! And by the time baby girl arrives, I'll be off the not-lifting-anything- over-20-lbs-restriction...
Last week we decided to wash all the baby clothes, and prepare the room. Jude had a blast helping dada put up the crib and birchtree decals we got from creative walls off of etsy of course! They were easy to put up and they had great customer service!! I also finished making the crib skirt, bumber, pillow and sweet birdies for her mobile. Today we are going to finish sanding and staining the changing table and armoire...it's all coming along!

I'm in awe of God's grace, mercy and goodness.

Nesting

2010-02-04T15:06:00.000-07:00

Well it's weeks before we bring our baby girl home, but I can't help but clean. It doesn't help that tomorrow I will be having gall bladder surgery...so all I think about is that I won't be able to clean clean. I'm taking a short break to blog and then it's back to shop vac-ing baseboards. :)

Today I received the birchtree decals I ordered off Etsy...I want to put them up....but I'm still waiting until it's closer to the due date. I can't even make myself wash the clothes that our family has so kindly bought already. The one "failed adoption" that we had...the baby was a girl...so I'm trying not to compare that situation to this one...because it's nothing like this one...and I don't really have the fear that that the birthfamily is going to change their adoption plans for their baby....but it's really difficult for me to completely un-guard my heart. So I'll wait a couple more weeks. The room is going to be darling. I had already painted it an aqua and cream...with chocolate and aqua damask accents...and the floor is shades of terracotta. There will be birch trees, peacocks, damask, sweet bunnies and maybe an owl or two...her crib bumber I still need to make (which will be aqua and chocolate damask)...and stain the furniture I bought 3 years ago...I don't know if we will get that done before she's here. I figure we have 6 months before we need to get her room completely done, since she will be sleeping in a bassinet in our room anyway. I'm excited to get this surgery over with and recover.

I'm praying for the birthfamily everyday...that they are strengthen through this whole process and that they feel God's love for them. I also pray that they both get the rest and health that they both need. They are so precious...and we absolutely love them.

Sugar and Spice

2010-01-28T20:57:00.000-07:00

As I sit here trying to figure out words to express God's grace, mercy and peace... I can't. It's been an amazing journey so far. Miracles are happening throughout this whole adoption process...that I can't even begin. The birthparents are beautiful. During our first meeting...we just sat and talked like old friends...
We pray that God will continue to knit our hearts together.

So since the last time I've blogged...we were told that it was a boy...however today at the ultrasound we found out that it's a girl!!!! We are amazed. Plain and simple. I can't belive that we will be meeting her in a matter of weeks. Our son has prayed for a baby sister for over a year now...so when we told him that it was a baby girl and not a boy...he was confused and excited...lol.

Now to return some not-so-gender neutral clothing and make some slight changes to our registry....and make a crazy amount of hair wraps and sweet booties with flowers!

The most daring blog I've written.

2010-01-18T22:42:00.000-07:00

To make a long story short. We will be adding to our family in about 2 months!
Now, like most domestic adoptions...circumstances can always change...but we are trusting God that He would close doors and open doors. So far, doors are swinging open.....with every other "opportunity" in the past year...doors shut immediately. I don't know God's plan for our family, but I do trust him. So, yes this is the most daring blog I've written...meaning that an adoption is not final until the papers are signed...yet I'm sharing with family, friends...and you!

I'm grateful that God has heard the cries of my heart. I'm overwhelmed with His peace...which is different for me. We are meeting the birthfamily in less that a week.

Our agency will not be facilitating this adoption because the baby is in another state...for even that I'm thankful. We always said (and were told) that our son's adoption (private, independent through lawyers...and way cheaper) really don't happen as often...and not to expect it to happen like that again. God did it!
The baby is a boy!
I will update on our journey after we meet the birthfamily.

Waiting

2009-12-13T23:34:00.000-07:00

I'm not going to lie...I think waiting sucks...to put it lightly and not lady-like. These last couple of weeks have been difficult and challenging in every way. I'm really not one to "air" my feelings into cyberspace...but I really don't feel like writing.
Last week we got a call that there was a BM that needed to make an adoption plan for her days old son or CYFD was going to take him. First the BM was already considering adoption...and was "leaning" towards picking us...but then decided to parent. Which is fine...it's her baby...her decision. All of her other children are in state custody. We were told if she did choose us...we would need to be there immediately...a 5 hour drive...etc.etc. I quickly realized that we weren't in a "stand-by-ready-at-the-door mode." I quickly and anxiously searched for newborn clothing...and all the works...found the infant carseat and soft blankets...newborn hats...and through them into the washer. All of that stuff has been stored deep into the mess, we call the garage, and I haven't looked at that stuff in such a long time...I tried not to fantasize about a newborn baby..that may or not may be my future son. My son and I raced to the store to buy diapers, wipes, newborn care stuff...and sweet little booties. I didn't tell Jude what or who they were for. He longs for a sibling...and if it didn't work out...I couldn't bare to tell him. So I just said they were gifts...they were...I wasn't exactly lying. I came home and folded each item and placed them in a diaper bag....and stood back...looking at the fresh and nicely folded heap of items. It was hard.
Reality sets in. I know that we haven't been picked. I know that if she doesn't choose adoption...CYFD isn't going to wait long to take custody of the baby....and once that happens...we wouldn't be able to adopt him....he would be "in the system." Our social worker calls and says that they haven't heard anything and she would call me tomorrow. A glimmer of hope sparkled in the distance. I prayed all night.

Morning came...and so did the phone call. The BM wasn't able to make the decision to place her baby...so he's now in the custody of the state. My first reaction was sorrow...not for me...but for the BM. I can't imagine what she is feeling. First she decided to place her baby....then to parent....and then it was decided for her. I just can't imagine. I know what it feels like to lose a child...I've done it twice. But I never was able to hold them. I'm still praying for this BM...whom I've never met...and I hope that she gets her life back.

Now I have a nicely folded heap of items...(which by the way...I was smart enough to buy in white, green and yellow)....which was quickly moved to the back bedroom...so I didn't have to pass by it 30 times a day...and re-live that I'm still waiting for my babies. Waiting sucks.

Oh wait I forgot to mention that during this time, I was supposed to make a trip to the location where my hubby is working to bring a load of stuff home. He only has one more week. I didn't want to leave and then we get a call that we need to be somewhere immediately. So we decided that I'd go the next day. My son ended up hurting his knee...and he may need surgery. Three years old...and may need knee surgery.
P.S. jumping over marbles to impress some pretty girls...is way overrated.

All I can say is this family is praying for a lot of miracles.

Catching Up...

2009-12-04T12:12:00.000-07:00

These last couple of weeks have forced me to neglect my blog...from the Flu to decorating the tree, baking, family having surgery, Thanksgiving, fairs, Fall, Winter..Snow...and lots of Etsy orders and Christmas Photo shoots...it's great to sit down for a bit and "catch up"

First...

We are still waiting to hear about the 3 little girls in foster care. Their social worker isn't able to give us any information...which we completely understand. The last update we had from their foster mom...is that they had another court date this past Monday...we don't know what was decided. We do know that the baby is now in state custody...we don't know why. I think about these girls and pray for them everyday...I pray for God's decision in their life...whether that means being reunited with their mother...or not... We hope that if they do become eligible for adoption that we would be considered.

During my son's prayers last night...he prayed that God would send him some baby sisters (he's been saying that for over a year lol) so that he can have someone to play with...he then turned to me and said "I will share all my toys and my bed." It's bittersweet to know that he is longing for a sibling...just as much as we are longing for more children. We hope that God answers our prayers very soon!

Fall and Winter...came so quickly this year...but I've enjoyed every moment of it. The changing leaves and cool weather put me in the mood for Christmas movies, hot cocoa and flannel sheets. Today we woke up to snow covered everything...I don't remember the last time it really snowed in Southern New Mexico...it's been years...usually we have to drive to the mountains...Jude had a blast playing, but quickly realized that being wet and cold was way overrated!

Since I've last blogged...I've added more Scoodies, Magnet Sets, Hair Wraps (for women and babies!) and Messengers to my store...I'm working on getting some more done this weekend...

The "Scoodie"

2009-10-22T16:01:00.003-06:00

I was browsing Brick and Mortar Shops the other night...wanting a cool scarf...I couldn't find exactly what I was looking for....so I decided to make something....I didn't want just a scarf and beanie set...soooooo I made this. I'm going to try and make some for my Etsy store in the next couple of days. The Scoodie...the perfect blend of a hoodie and a scarf to keep my and everyone else's head, warm this winter. I want to make some for kiddies...maybe some that match my booties....wouldn't that be cute.

the Ups n' Downs....of Fall

2009-10-19T12:05:00.008-06:00

As I have mentioned before...Fall is my favorite season....the changing leaves, relief from the heat, and yummy baked goods. We decided to go on a picnic to McKittrick Canyon...where we heard that there was an amazing display of Fall leaves. I packed us an amazing picnic lunch...that wasn't on the light side...and my hubby packed his backpack full of unnecessary items for a picnic...which weighed around 35 lbs. We were under the impression that this was a light hike...and didn't see the signs posted that it was a 6.8 mile round trip. I failed to mention that my back is still hurting and we took Jude. The trip quickly turned sour...meltdowns followed. Joseph ended up carrying Jude, his backpack...and until I felt sorry for him....the picnic bag....3 miles is a long way if you are carrying an extra 70 lbs...so we ended up finding a quiet spot and eating our picnic lunch....and heading back. Jude was also working on his Junior Ranger Badge...and we missed the station closing my minutes....so we decided to come back the next day.

We packed lighter, made PB&J's and started 3 hours early....Jude also got his badge before we left...we thought, "man, this going so good so far!" Famous Last Words.
About an hour into the hike Jude falls....and face plants on a rock....blood, tears...and a chipped tooth...the boy is determined to knock those teeth out....we don't have anything medical but wipes, "neo to go" and some bandaids. There is nothing to do...but comfort him. He calmed down 5 minutes later, so we decided to keep going and made it to the Pratt Cabin...where we eat an "ok" picnic linner (lunch/dinner) and explored the cabin. Jude immediately told anyone that would listen, "I busted my tooth on a rock and it's broken" When were on our way back we stopped at the famous rock...and found the little chip of tooth still there! The entire way back we heard "put my tooth back on...it hurts!" Poor little guy.
The Fall leaves were amazing, and the canyon was beautiful...I did get some great pics...but I'm not sure if it was worth all the trouble.

Fall on the Brain

2009-10-08T20:01:00.003-06:00

This week has been "difficult" to say the least. I hurt my back for the hundredth time...but there always seems to be good that comes from everything. Since I'm doing a lot of laying/sitting around....it has given me more time to create. I doesn't hurt to move my arms...so I can still sew or glue.
I've also been able to slow down and enjoy the changing weather. Last Sunday was the harvest moon....we drove right into it for most of the night....surrounded by the desert's colorful skies and perfect purple mountains...it was breath taking. In the town that we are staying in...is a cute fabric shop that actually sold real felt....with wool...not just polyester. I've had a difficult time finding high quality wool felt...so I hit the jackpot...this of course came after I ordered a bunch online. However I found the perfect shade of pumpkin spice orange and made this hair wrap. It in honor of the best season....Fall

This weekend is the pumpkin festival and corn maze....I think I can manage making popcorn balls and homemade cocoa....pics to follow :)

Adoption Process Update: today we got a phone call from the previous foster care situation. The foster mother told us that their social worker was very excited to get into contact with us. So we called and left a message. We still have a lot of questions....but it's a step forward.

Sunday Sunday Sunday

2009-09-30T09:15:00.002-06:00

We met a couple that is fostering 2 sweet girls ages 2 and 5 this past Sunday. Afterwards, the foster mom told us that they were currently looking for a forever family for them and that they have an 8 month old sister and "one on the way" that may be taken by the state. We still don't know all the details...or if the state is really going to terminate rights. But we did tell her we were interested. We also had a meeting with our social worker to drop off additional paperwork (So thankful we found everything!) and told her about it. She also told us that they were going to show our profile to 2 birthfamilies this week. We are hoping that the door opens for us this time around. We are extremely guarded....we have to be!

My new adventure

2009-09-23T16:09:00.004-06:00

So I was invited to a wedding and the only dress I could find that I liked was black...I'm not big on wearing an all black dress to a wedding...so I decided to make something for my hair. I began sketching a simple flower head wrap....and then made this. I decided to add these to my Etsy store and will be working hard to get one in every color done this week. I'm also going to offer matching hair clips that will match the booties that I make.

At least now, I won't show up as the angel of death.

I heart photography

2009-09-08T23:50:00.010-06:00

My latest. I heart photography. I heart getting paid for something I'm passionate about. I think typing "I heart" is lame.

guns and tattoos

2009-08-26T10:57:00.004-06:00

I've got two choices...to be bored or be creative...
The town we have temporarily moved to, has absolutely nothing to do...for me or my son. We've tried going back and forth to our home town, but being away from daddy is too much. I've been thinking about making a Man-Bag lately....I made this one...but my hubby said that he didn't think the color was manly enough....so I made him model it :) and listed it as a unisex bag. I like the color...but then again...I am a woman. I'm making another one that is chocolate and khaki....that's "manly" right?

On another note, my son turned 3 1/2 last weekend....I can believe it...it seems like yesterday we were going through the crazy whirlwind of adoption...
Every 6 months I do a "photo shoot" with him...I searched high and low for temp tats...the dollar store came through for me...paired with an awesome hat, wife beater and real converse...I had a ham on my hands.

Tattoo

2009-08-05T10:45:00.005-06:00

I've decided that for my 30th birthday (which was last March lol) I'm going to get the tattoo that I've wanted for years. However...in order to do this in December...I made a goal to get in shape...by using the semi-torture tool of P90X and jogging. P90X is intense and kinda crazy. I'm on day 2...and my arms are rendered useless. My hubby is doing it too...he loves giving me those "way to go" slaps on the butt....I find it annoying. I'd slap him...but yet again...my arms are useless. I will say that it is hard to do an hour of exercise with my 3 year old, but it's super adorable to see him try and do the exercises. So we will see in 90 days if I feel my effort is tattoo worthy.

I made front page of etsy

2009-07-21T23:28:00.002-06:00

I was so excited to learn that my Jack Bear Booties made the front page this morning. I was wondering why I had a crazy amount of views and 24 new "hearts"! It is such an honor...especially since Etsy Administration put it together!

Lap Top Messengers...for the birds

2009-07-17T15:51:00.003-06:00

I custom made this mustard yellow canvas messenger for my friend last week...I loved it so much that I made one in a beautiful sky blue and chocolate...this was my first time "free handing"...or should I say "free-sewing" a picture...I loved this bag so much I almost didn't list it on my store. Lately I've been slightly obsessed with birds...not live ones...I'm honestly not a fan...but the silhouettes of birds on branches.

No updates on the adoption portion of my life...I'm working on a second replica of the "dear birthparent" scrapbook...for the agency and that's about it.

Wait Train

2009-07-07T15:57:00.003-06:00

Today the world laid to rest a music icon....to which I will say that I cried like a baby through the whole memorial...not because I'm going to miss Michael Jackson, but because I felt for his children. I can't imagine their pain.

I also just found out that the birthmother choose the other family. I'm not sad...more disappointed...and now my mind can be at rest. I don't have to wonder if I said the right things or wish I said something different. All I can do is be a good wife to my hubby and a mommy to my son...and get back on the "wait" train. (more like roller coaster lol) And it will start all over again. I lean on God for He is my strong tower...

Over and Out

2009-06-30T12:37:00.002-06:00

Well we had our phone conference today...I just got off the phone, so I'm still trying to process the whole thing. It went well...we answered some tough questions...and the birthmother is amazing. However, I don't know if we are the family she is looking for. I just have that feeling. Who knows...

All we can do is wait and see...
I'm trying not to over analyze the whole conversation...that's soooo hard for me.
I am glad that the first initial phone call is over...the anticipation of the unknown is gone. So now we are waiting for her to choose or not choose us. I don't know how long that will take...hopefully soon we will have an answer.

What's in a conversation?

2009-06-26T15:04:00.004-06:00

A birthmother from our agency has narrowed her decision down to 2 families...and we are one of them. (enter happy jig here) We have a phone conference with her on Tuesday. I've never done this before. With Jude's birthmother we just met at a restaurant...up close and personal. The kicker is that my hubby will be 3 hours away at his lunch break...so we won't be able to "read each other"...let's just say I won't be able to "give him the eye" if he needs it lol. This is the next step. If she choses us...she is due in 6 weeks. I have butterflies in my stomach...I'm hopeful, yet cautious. She hasn't picked us yet...and if she doesn't pick us...that's okay too. I'm restraining myself from daydreaming about the nursery, what the sex of the baby is, what it will feel like to hold a newborn in my arms...okay I'm stopping. I don't know what questions she will be asking us...so everything will be on the spot answers...I'm a "prepare ahead" type of gal...so the anticipation is overwhelming. My only peace is knowing that it's in God's hands...

so what's in a conversation....?

....our baby could be.

p.s. the pic is of my hubby and son on our trip to San Diego a couple of weeks ago.

Whirlwind

2009-06-23T14:20:00.002-06:00

So to make a blog entry short...it's been an eventful 3 weeks. We went on vacation for an entire week in San Diego...family action packed...only to return home...wash our clothes and move 3 hours away from home. My hubby got a detail for 6 months. Before we left...literally the next day, we met with our social worker to read through our homestudy...it was weird reading about what someone else thinks of you. It went well.

Right before we left on vacation she called to say that there were 2 potential birthfamilies...however one family decided on a family in another state...and the other one wasn't sure she was going to choose adoption....

So that's that...and that is okay!

Just minutes ago she called and said there was another potential birthmother. Her plan for her baby matches ours and they will be showing her our profile. She is due in August.

We are excited...even if she doesn't choose us. Just getting the ball rolling is comforting. We are in the whirlwind of waiting...seeing if they choose us...not getting our hopes up...but yet getting excited....The only thing we can do is pray and continue to live our lives with the comfort of knowing that someday...and hopefully soon...we will be bringing our kiddo home.

On another note...moving 3 hours away is hard. I miss my family dearly...and my sister just moved back into town. Jude misses his "gramps" and talks to him everyday. When we arrived here...we moved into a house we saw online...it looked great in the pics...but was NOT ok. So we moved out of there after 2 days and into another one...so I finally feel like I can set up "house"...but I'm ready to go back home for the weekend...back to "my" Walmart, Co-op, Target and bed.

Painting the roses red...well more like rust...

2009-05-25T10:49:00.017-06:00

When we bought our house..we knew that someday we would be ripping up the carpet and laying tile or wood...never considering staining the concrete because it is so incredibly expensive. The first thing we did was rip up the carpet in our room because there was carpet in the bathroom....which to me is so disgusting. We put in a calico looking floor because we had a friend who had a bunch of left overs from different houses that he had laid. I love the effect it has. A couple of years later we decided to rip up the rest of the carpet and lay tile down..except for the back bedrooms. I love the coolness of tile and the fact that you can get it so clean you can eat off of it! We ended up ripping up the carpet in one of the back bedrooms and have been living off the ugly concrete that was splattered with paint, stain and dry wall from 20 plus years ago. I started researching painting, etching, and acid washing/staining concrete. I didn't want to paint because we have friends that have done that....and anytime you move furniture...there goes the paint...etching...too much trouble...and staining I love love love the way it looks...but it is way way to expensive...even for a small room...plus it's with acid.

When we went on a weekend retreat to the hills of Kingston...the place we stayed at had all acid washed concrete...or so I thought. I asked "Pete" if he had acid washed this entire building...it was pretty big..and thought it must of cost a fortune. He smiled and said no....we used ferrous sulfate...and did the entire house for around $50. WHAT???

So that's what we did.

I'm not going to lie...it's work...but because it is so cheap...it's worth it. Of course we were taking everything out of a very messy bedroom, ripping up carpet, tack strip...and then scrubbing 20 plus years of paint, stain and dry wall...and we had to paint all the walls because the baseboards were put in after the carpet...so there was a 1 inch gap, and then patching the concrete and so on. If you were starting with a clean slab it would be way easier. So for 2 rooms we bought 2 bags ferrous sulfate called Copperas, patch and tool and garden sprayer and concrete sealer.. which came to...about $55. (excluding paint and a new fabulous bedspread that was on clearance) If you have all the tools that's more money saved.

Step 1: get everything out of the room and rip out carpet and tack strip. Remove baseboards if you can't live with the gap. (if there is one) If there isn't a gap...tape the baseboards with painters tape because the ferrous sulfate will "grey" the wood.

Step 2: scrap up any paint, drywall...etc off of floor. We started with an razor blade the get off varnish and then switched to hot water and industrial steel wool to get off the paint and drywall. We even got up stain...

Step 3: Get the concrete as clean as possible. We used the shop vac, swept, and mopped..

Step 4: Patch any holes in the concrete. We used vinyl patch concrete..which didn't exactly get smooth...but it worked. After it dried we took a drywall mud tool and scrapped any patch that wasn't even with the floor...we then took a towel and cleaned around each hole to get up any patch residue.

Step 5: Prepare the ferrous sulfate. We didn't know how much solution we would need..so we made 2 gallons...(2lbs ferrous sulfate per gallon) which was plenty for a 175 square foot room. Boil 2 gallons of water...add fertilizer...(yeah it's a fertilizer) and stir for about 5 minutes..strain into a bucket. We used a bungee cord to tie an old towel to a bucket and poured through twice. It will separate into rust and greenish water....stir well and pour into sprayer.

Step 6: spray on floor. Use a sweeping motion keeping a wet edge. Put something down if you plan on putting the sprayer down because it will leave a ring if it gets wet. I first used a roller which was a pain in the butt...I was afraid of the sprayer...but quickly switched on the next layers...you let each layer dry completley before adding more. we live in New Mexico where there is no humidity...so it dried in 20 minutes. Oh and don't wear shoes...go barefoot or wear socks. I did 4 layers.

First layer

Second layer

4th layer (I forgot to take pics of the 3rd)

After the 4th layer dried...you must now mop up on all the extra rust...we used hot water and a mop with white vinegar...maybe a cup per gallon...I didn't measure...it took about 4 times to mop everything up...

4th layer and sealing with a high gloss concrete sealer...the sealer darkened the floor to a mixture of dark terracota and chocolate...so beautiful.

It was a lot of work...but it was worth it!

homestudy and Jude update

2009-05-17T15:27:00.003-06:00

Well a quick update on our adoption process...

Our social worker is in the final stages of our homestudy...although our profile is available to any birth mothers/families that may come into the agency. We are happy, so far, of how things have been going and still feel confident. Adoption is a hard process...and sometimes there is a long wait...and sometimes not. It can be a rollercoaster of emotions...if you let it be. We just know that we will wait for as long as it takes to bring our kiddos home.

I've enjoyed the weather these past days...finally allowing us to go outside without being blown away. Jude has really liked his new clubhouse/swingset and plays on it everyday. A couple of evenings ago, we sat outside...enjoying the coolness of the grass and ate a bowl full of cherries. It's times like that, that I think Jude will remember. He's getting so big. His vocabulary is amazing...and sometime embarassing. He's quick to point things out...that really should be said behind doors....and he still hasn't mastered his "quiet voice." We are working on that.

A spontaneous get-away

2009-04-17T21:56:00.005-06:00

We were in dire need to spend some quality time together. My husband realized he would have a 4 day weekend coming up and asked what I wanted to do. I knew immediately.

I got on the phone....

and booked 2 nights at a Bed and Breakfast called the Black Range Lodge in Kingston NM. We had never been there before, but heard that it was beautiful. The population of Kingston is 21.....yes 21 people! It is a cluster of historic houses nestled in the hills...away from everything. Pete and Catherine were amazing and interesting in everyway...we enjoyed their company and the bountiful breakfast of pheasant omelets, fresh orange juice, homemade bread and sourdough waffles with coconut syrup. My hubby and I enjoyed a 4 hour hike up the Black Mountain Range....surrounded by tall pine trees and crisp mountain air. It was a reminder that we really do enjoy each others company! We shared an MRE...which I had never had...and I was surprised how good it was.

That night we decided to go out for dinner. The nearest open restaurants were 45 minutes away in Truth or Consequences, NM. We stopped at one restaurant....and while we were walking up...a lady asked if we knew where the BellaLuca was at. We didn't, but had a newspaper with a local map and advertisements in it....we gave her the address and then decided to follow....and we are so thankful that we did. It was the most amazing food....the calamari was hands down the best we have EVER eaten....and in the middle of nowhere! It was tossed with yellow peppers, roasted bellpepper, some kind of oil dressing on a bed of red lettuce. We ended up eating there again the next day.

I also booked us a couple's massage at the Sierra Grande Lodge. We sat in our own private hotspring bath outside for 30 minutes and then had an hour massage....it was bliss. I love how professional they were and the inviting simple decor....it was very zen-ish. After everything was done...my hubby brought me a super dark chocolate truffle....

I am one happy gal.

The Man Bag, M-urse, Man-ssenger...

2009-03-28T15:36:00.004-06:00

So I finally finished it...the Man Bag...the Murse (not to be confused with a male nurse lol)...the MAN-ssenger...it's made from cotton duck canvas...making it water resistant. It's padded with fusible fleece interfacing, has a large inside pocket and a small pocket for keys and pens and has a 45.5" canvas strap on D-rings. I had a blast designing this...with some input from my hubby...who is modeling it. This bag is super durable and would be great for a laptop, diaper bag...overnight bag...or want ever your manly heart desires...for more info/pics...click here

Lap Top Messenger

2009-03-26T16:28:00.002-06:00

I spent two sleepless nights thinking about designing a laptop messenger. I went ahead and made one today...it came out perfect. With dimensions of 13" by 18" it can accommodate a large laptop and would also be perfect as a diaper bag, overnight bag or to lug around your artist supplies.

I went to our local fabric shop yesterday...bribing my son with chicken nuggets (he hates going lol) and bought lots of new fabric...I spent the rest of the afternoon cutting out 8 messengers...so I have a lot of sewing to do...but I love it.

Spring cleaning or Nervous Energy?

2009-03-20T15:54:00.006-06:00

So for the past week I've been doing things around the house, that I have been waiting to do forever. When we moved into our home, I spent days ripping off 80's wallpaper and painting. So by the time I made it to the bathrooms...I didn't care anymore. So they have been a boring white until this week...oh they did both have hideous borders that I scrapped off...but other than that...boring white. I decided on a deep chocolate brown with aqua accents...those colors seem so relaxing yet refreshing. After finishing the guest bathroom...I still had some paint left over...so I painted our bathroom as well. I love it.

I've also had this overwhelming urge to clean and organize all of the closets in the house. I don't know why. Maybe it's nervous energy with the adoption process...or an urgency to get things in order before we add to our family...knowing that there won't be much time to paint, organize and etc or...I just like things to be in order...who knows.

I also planted our spring veggies. If you haven't heard about "gardening by the square foot", you should google it. Last year it yielded 13 inch zucchinis and so many tomatoes we couldn't eat them all. I love being able to go outside and pick fresh herbs and veggies to cook with. It's also teaching Jude on how to care for something. I let him help me water, weed and pick.

Speaking of Jude, last night was "one of those nights" when we put him to bed and the fight began. He loves to wait about 20 minutes...when you finally dozed off and are done for the night...to scream..."I've got to go poooop!" Now...you can't deny him his right to go poop...and for the most part he really does need to go....so there I go...get him up, turn light on...tell him to sit down...and then walk back to my room...after 1 second...he says "I'm doooone....go check...nothing. Explain to him that he can't get up anymore and it's time for bed....he does this for the next 2 hours....it's midnight...my husband has to get up in 4 hours...and is not happy. He finally does go....but then screams..."it's stuck...help" I quickly get up, not knowing what's in store....I turn the corner and there he is on the potty...with his child potty seat stuck around his head. I immediately start laughing and grab the camera. Wow I'm such a good mom....right? Maybe this is how we all learned common sense. I took several minutes to get it off...me laughing...him crying....and pics to document it all.

keeping busy

2009-03-18T09:40:00.003-06:00

Well I finished our scrapbook file this past weekend...and I turned it in before I remembered to take some pics. It was a lot of fun, time consuming and nerve racking. When you think about it...our children's birthmother will be holding that book...we carefully crafted our words...thinking about each subject and how she would feel reading it. For instance when it came to Jude...we could have made a thousand pages of him....I have pics of every week of his life for the 1st year...and every month after that lol, but we didn't want the BM to think her child would be 2nd best. So I made 2 pages of him...describing our struggles with infertility, briefly his birthstory and his excitement to be a big brother. The whole thing came out beautifully. So now our social worker is working on writing our homestudy. We have submitted all the paperwork for that. From this point on...it is a waiting game.

I've had a lot of extra energy this week...eventhough not a lot of sleep. I painted our guest bathroom a dark chocolate brown. I bought a new over the toilet storage thingy...in chocolate and have aqua accents...it came out lovely. I've also been busy working in our yard...planting lettuce, snappeas, purple onions and herbs...my dad helped me transplant some rose trees from my aunts house.

I need to make some more items for my etsy store...I just can't decide what. Blanket sets, Booties, Messengers or Magnets...I tend to sell in cycles....some things will fly off "the rack" one month...and the next another. So we will see....I'm thinking Messengers...it's spring..and soon summer...we all need something to carry all our crap in!

Jude helping grandpa plant the rose trees

a relief...

2009-03-12T22:01:00.004-06:00

well today was the last "interview" portion for our homestudy. I'm so relieved and happy. It went well...and I felt way more relaxed....eventhough we were interviewed separately. I feel like it went smoothly.

Things you may need to have in place before your homestudy

1) a fire exit plan posted

2) fire extinquisher

3) emergency numbers posted

4) copy of children's immunizations or pet's shot records

5) keyed entry to any medicine cabinet

6) child locks on everything

7) comfort food...for afterwards :)

Jude was so cute today....he always asks a million questions about everything...and he asked why "that lady" was coming today...and then before I could answer...he so very matter-a-factly states "because she's going to help us get a baby sister..." I just nod.

He also peed in a cup today....we were in the shower and he insisted that I hand him his cup and close my eyes....I was washing my hair...when I realized what he has said....I looked down and he handed me a cup of pee...all I could do was laugh.

My Newest Booties Collection

2009-03-09T22:21:00.005-06:00

So I got my first wholesale order ...well my first legit wholesale order last weekend...yes, while throwing my son a fabulous birthday party and getting ready for our homestudy! I completed them and decided to go ahead and list them as "not ready-made". I am working on having them all ready made...but it takes some time...here they are...and they are adorable! I think the hardest part was naming them all lol. I have about 5 more styles that I haven't listed....

P.S. I think the homestudy went well...you never know....we do have our next interview this Thursday.

The process...in a nutshell

2009-03-06T14:53:00.002-07:00

Okay so here are the details....
First we submitted our application....
They accepted it.

Then they conduct a "home study" which is just a nice word for: judging whether or not your home, health, sex life, emotional status, mental status and everything else under the sun, is suitable for a child. They come into our home and observe and interview you for a certain amount of hours....and you also have to be fingerprinted for background checks...

if or when you pass...they type all this stuff up...for later in court when you are petitioning for adoption of a child...

okay then we are placed on a list...and wait...

then a birthmother/family will contact them...they will counsel her and help her make the decision on whether adoption is the right decision for her/family...and ask her questions on what type of family she is interested in.

then they present birthfamily with scrapbooks that each potential adoptive families have made of their lives

She will then choose.

petition court for termination of rights
(lots of legal stuff here...)

Baby is born.

Agency places baby with us and does home visits until we can legally petition for adoption

Petition for adoption and go to court...adoption is complete...submit forms for new birth certificate

and live happliy ever after...or until we decide to do it all over again lol

In the Beginning....

2009-02-25T14:30:00.005-07:00

Our adoption application was accepted!

So we have our first appointment to begin the whole homestudy process, this Tuesday (March 3rd). There is so much wonder that goes through one's mind, when beginning this leg of the journey...."is my house clean enough" "will I answer that question correctly" "do I look like a good mom" it can be overwhelming. I understand that it is completely necessary to insure the safety and well-being of the child...but I really don't like being judged...but who does...So I'm excited, nervous....happy....and I'm willing to do whatever it takes to bring our kids home.

Turning 3

2009-02-18T16:37:00.008-07:00

There is something that happens when you strap a gun...real or fake to a boy's (or man's) hip. I took pictures of my son today...dressed as a cowboy. We are having an "Outlaw Johnny Cash Cowboy" B-day party....he is turning three. He immediately took on a whole different personality...walking different, making mad faces and asking if he's allowed to shoot birds. I had a good laugh this afternoon...watching him strut around...I had to convince him to wash the moustache off to take a nap. I love throwing theme parties...I tend to go over the top...but this is the day that my heart was flooded with joy....the day that ended the longing for a child and the day I became a mama. I still remember seeing his beautiful red lips, skinny legs and almost bald head for the first time...and singing "you are my sunshine" as I rocked him to sleep in the nursery. This is going to be a fun party...I'll post more pics after next weekend.

2009-02-13T17:41:00.003-07:00

I freehanded this card for my husband for Valentine's Day...it came along with some freshly baked brownies and a 4 pack of Jones Soda...we are celebrating tonight, Friday the 13th (dundundunnnn) because tomorrow I'm getting my CCL (Concealed Carry License)...why is Friday the 13th so "unlucky" who made that decision? Why not Tuesday the 13th or Monday? I always liked Friday the 13th because someone would always call in a "bomb threat" to our school...and we just got to screw around all day...well while all you love birds are going out to dinner, getting dozens of roses and watching sappy movies...I'll be shooting my heart out.

Dear Birth Parent

2009-02-09T17:02:00.003-07:00

So the update is....YES! This is the ideal agency for us. We felt extremely comfortable and are super excited to be turning in our application later this week. They asked us to start working on a scrapbook and "dear birth parent" letter that they will present to each birth family that we match....I don't even know where to begin...my heart is flooded with emotions and run-on sentences, oh and 8 years worth of photos. I'm just trying to sort through it all.

Hobby Lobby is having an amazing sale on all their scrapbook supplies....which this time, I didn't hesitate to buy the album I've been coveting for the past year, with no real excuse to buy it...until now...it's beautiful....black and aqua damask...

So now I'm happily looking through all our photos on our computer...remembering when Jude was born....the stories....trips...experiences...and thinking that someday...hopefully soon....my son or daughter's birthmother will be holding this album...turning the pages...seeing just a glimpse into our lives....... and choosing us.

To be or not to be....we will see

2009-02-06T11:54:00.000-07:00

A couple of weeks ago, my hubby, Jude and I were driving home from a fantastic lunch at a new bakery when we saw a huge sign that read "Adoption Services." We quickly looked at each other in surprise because there isn't an adoption agency for hundreds of miles in our state. Joe asked if we should turn around....in which I replied..."sure, but it's probably an adoption program for pets" (LOL) I quickly realized we were both dressed NOT to impress...which is important to me...I don't know why, but it is...we went in...and yes it IS a real adoption agency that is just getting started. (they've also worked with the foster care system for sometime) They were very nice....(but not in a bubbly kind of way...which I admit, makes me nervous...) and professional....and they didn't seem to mind that we were not dressed to impress LOL....we actually walked in on a meeting they were having...but they took a couple of minutes to gives us the info we desired. Needless to say we have an appointment with them today at 5 pm. I'm excited....but there is always that side of me that says....it may be too good to be true. However I did say that when Jude's birthmother said "yes, I would like you to adopt my baby"....so that's not always the truth. I'm trying to keep myself from daydreaming about a new nursery....lol...ahhhhhh the joys of waiting

Birth of a Shoe

2009-01-31T22:16:00.000-07:00

I took pictures of a childhood friend and her hubby who were pregnant with their first baby. I've taken lots of prego pics, but these are particularly special to me....as she was making her "birthing plan" she asked me to be there when she gave birth to their little girl. I think a dream

of mine is to become a doula at some point in my life...because I truly love the whole process of birth. Sweet baby Mia came into this world last Wednesday...with jet black hair, arms flying, legs kicking, greeted by bright lights and crying faces...it was amazing. The next day I made these little booties...and named them Mia Jade.

Baking bread from scratch

2009-01-23T21:34:00.001-07:00

Over a year ago we started milling our own wheat to make wholesome, nay more than wholesome...bread. It is absolutely delicious and packed with vital nutrients that commercial bread lacks.....even the "whole grain" crap you buy doesn't even hold a light up to the amazing nutrients that are in freshly milled flour...

I also enjoy letting my son help whever he can...is more like "letting mama help me".....here's some pics of our adventure

All the ingredients...raw local honey, cold pressed organic olive oil, sea salt, local eggs, yeast, lecithin and water...yes that's also wine...that's for mama

Digging in the red winter wheat bucket

Putting the wheat berries in the mill

turning it on...

...whoa...kinda freaked out (it sounds like an airplane)

Feeling a lot safer on the floor...

Putting everything in...(it's hard trying to take a pic and help pour lol)

Eating honey off the spoon...

Smelling the most important ingredient...yeast

after kneading, rising, shaping, rising again...and baking...

fabulous bread from scratch....

we ate it with butter and apricot preserves...it was amazing!

Cutest Baby Set...

2009-01-15T15:17:00.000-07:00

So I haven't been making any new baby blanket sets...due to that they maybe illegal in the weeks to come...but a friend of mine ordered one...Rockabilly Style...I swear this is the cutest one I've made! I'm contemplating on making me one as well! A large blanket...50"x36", booties, and two burp cloths...

What I did over the holidays....whew!

2009-01-15T14:12:00.000-07:00

It was a crazy Christmas Holiday for me this year...which I'm grateful that I had...and grateful that I survived it! In the days before, I had a huge order of 100 magnet sets (yes that's 400 magnets) that I had to send out, a wedding to shoot...Etsy store orders and local orders....and then my lovely hubby tells me that we are leaving the day after Christmas for Texas to visit his family (17 hour trip!)....and that's not including shopping, decorating, cooking, baking, wrapping, packing...etc...for us. Let's just say I didn' sleep much...and my family and best friend really surrounded me and helped me get these things done.

I'm including some pics from the wedding...which was beautiful...yet not the ideal photography conditions...super dark, no ceiling to bounce the flash...and surrounded by windows...

New Mess Bags

2009-01-12T17:25:00.000-07:00

Well with the holiday rush over...I can finally enjoy sewing again. I've got some super cute messenger bags lined up for the next couple of weeks...with new fabrics and textures...and fabulous colors. The model is one of my friends...she's in a band and she's amazing..

my photography

2008-12-02T22:19:00.000-07:00

I love taking pictures....I used to work as a typesetter for my local newspaper office, when I was in high school. They quickly realized that I was a perfectionist with a dash of OCD...and was perfect for the job. One of the sports photographers started training me in the dark room and I was instantly in love...not with him, you sicko....but with photography :) My junior year, my school needed to send a high school student to a college course in journalism...mind you I was never in journalism....and they sent me...I have no idea why. My 1st week there was miserable...I had never been away from my parents, was EXTREMELY shy...and I was surrounded by total strangers....in a class that I never had interest in. I sat and cried in the Mac Lab...because I couldn't figure out how to turn on the darn thing....much less understand any of the programs (I had a PC)....and none of those journalism snobs helped me. They were too busy making out. By the third week I was ready to go home...until they handed each of us a camera. Our assignment was to take a whole roll of film, develop it and come up with a quirky tagline...needless-to-say...I won the contest....and I've never stopped.

I mostly enjoy taking pictures of pregos, babies, children and families....I've shot some weddings...but they are so stressful....but they pay well!

sewing up a storm...well kinda

2008-11-20T11:48:00.000-07:00

So last Friday I dislocated two ribs...how? I'd like to know! So that put a major damper on my sewing...what usually takes me hours, took me days...but I'm incredible happy to have listed these today. They are beautiful! I have a friend coming tomorrow to model them for me...so the pics are a little blah...but under the circumstances...I'm just happy to have them up!

ohhh how I love Fall

2008-11-17T16:24:00.000-07:00

Fall...my favorite time of year (besides Christmas)...yes it offically arrived weeks ago, however our trees just turned a beautiful bright yellow. This is the time of year I come alive...baking pumpkin everything, making popcorn balls, sipping hot tea (just bought some from teaman and it's fabulous)...and the smell of roasting chile fills the air. I love every bit of it.

here is my all time favorite popcorn ball recipe:

INGREDIENTS
3/4 cup light corn syrup
1/4 cup margarine
2 teaspoons cold water
2 5/8 cups confectioners' sugar
1 cup marshmallows
5 quarts plain popped popcorn (3 bags of mircrowave popcorn...)

(I add 2 teaspoons of ameretto, vanilla OR even peppermint flavoring...oh an a couple of drops of food coloring depending on the holiday)

DIRECTIONS
In a saucepan over medium heat, combine the corn syrup, margarine, cold water, confectioners' sugar and marshmallows. Heat and stir until the mixture comes to a boil. Carefully combine the hot mixture with the popcorn, coating each kernel.
Grease hands with vegetable shortening and quickly shape the coated popcorn into balls before it cools. Wrap with cellophane or plastic wrap and store at room temperature.

I love to wrap in saran wrap and tie with raffia or yarn....ahhh I love Fall!!

I love to custom make...my magnet sets

2008-11-16T12:24:00.000-07:00

I am a gift giver...and I do it well. I love the whole packaging process and imagine my friends, my family and my customers opening up the gift I've wrapped and always tied with raffia. I also like tucking snips of greenery or flowers from outside under the bow...my heart goes into that lol.

I also love to custom make. I love that the customer had their hand in the process and hopefully get exactly what they wanted. I love it when I get exactly what I want :) I custom made these for Enyaeire (by the way you should check out her shop for amazing crochet items)

I listed these pretties today...all my magnet sets make great gifts...whether its stocking stuffers, office parties, hostess, teachers, best friends...or just a thinking about you gift! Plus I can custom make to have almost any picture you want!

my etsy store...a little about what I make

2008-11-14T15:49:00.000-07:00

I've been creating things my whole life...as a child I was ALWAYS doodling, drawing or gluing something....it runs in the family. I basically make things I would want to receive.

I love sewing now...however for years we had a love-hate relationship. In 7th grade I was in a home education class that taught how to sew. We had to make pillows out of our initials...mine were MRS...as I started the 1st one and SEWED my finger...needless to say...that was the last time I sewed until weeks before my son was due. My mom is an amazing seamstress...she'll tell you she'd not...but she really is. I asked her to teach me to read patterns so I could make a baby kimono for my son's dedication. I shortly began making purses for friends and myself....and haven't stopped since. I love picking fabrics and seeing the end product.

I've been making baby sets for years...I used to make the no-sew fleece blankets until I started sewing and just recently added sweet kimono-style booties. I love love love snuggle flannel because the more you wash it...the softer it gets. I've made my son pajamas out of it...and he loves it! I still use the burp cloths too....they are perfect for runny noses and won't rub them raw.

I also love choosing fabrics that are non-traditional...

I can sit for hours looking at different papers to create my magnet sets. These are the perfect little gift for anyone....teachers, office, just thinking of you, wedding and baby shower hostesses...and they are inexpensive! Every set I make....I question whether to keep them for myself!

my sunshine boy

2008-11-14T15:18:00.000-07:00

Jude: full of energy, leader, strong, hard-headed, stubborn, super smart, uncompromising, mechanically inclined, sweet, caring, helper, strong-willed, loving, sensitive, teaser, loves to learn and to be read to... 2 years old...and counting.

He is our sunshine boy. He keeps me busy 24-7... but I love it. I can't believe God would entrust us to be his parents and to nurture this precious gift...he brings so much life to our lives!

We had a blast taking him to the Corn Maze this year...it was my first year that my hubby could go. Jude spent the majority of the night dancing....he's just like his mama!

our Adoption Journey

2008-11-14T10:32:00.000-07:00

well since this is my very first blog...I thought I might explain a little why I started my Etsy store, a little about myself and our journey to parenthood....

I've been married for over 8 years to a wonderful man. We got married young...right out of Bible School...and wanted to start a family (well I did lol) after a couple years. After losing two pregnancies I was diagnosed with PCOS which I'm not really sure I have. (I don't have any symptoms...but have all the symptoms of low progesterone...I'm no doctor...but I know my body)

After a "failed adoption" (birthmother changed mind at last minute) and fertility treatments for 5 months with no success....I decided to just give up on the dream of being a mama.

About 6 months later, we got a phone call from a coworker of my husbands...that knew someone who wanted to choose adoption for her unborn baby...without going into too much detail....she chose us!

We saw our beautiful son Jude being born and went home with us the next day. Our lives, including my family, have not been the same since...I'll blog more about him later.

So now it's been almost 3 years and we are ready to begin the adoption process again. We don't know if it will again be an independent, private adoption, or through a facilitator or an agency. We are hoping for another independent...but those are rare...but we are hopeful...either way adoption is very expensive....and so enters my Etsy Store! (Oh I forgot to say that we are hoping to adopt twins...)

I opened it 3 months ago and I absolutely enjoy making stuff and selling it! I make messenger bags, magnet sets, baby blanket sets and sweet booties. I also take pictures locally and enjoy that as well. All of our proceeds go to our adoption fund!

so with that...I will continue to blog about our adoption journey, mishaps in parenthood, my crazy two year old, God, family, rants, rages and whatever else comes to this meloncoly/choleric mind.